Tag Archives: Boobs

Big American Breasts

Once upon a time, I wanted to have big American breasts. By the time I reached twenty-one, I felt ready to provide myself with what genetics had overlooked. A particularly buxom acquaintance recommended her plastic surgeon.
 
I scheduled my appointment, paid the consultation fee, and met with the doctor. Silicone implants in varying sizes lined his desk, and volumes of black binders filled with “before & after” photos adorned his shelves. I was on the precipice of my dream!
 
I posed for my “before” photo, filled out paperwork and prepared to set the date. That is when the doctor informed me of a “perk” that was the deal breaker. Post-surgery, I would be chauffeured home in a limousine for all the neighbors and lookie-loos to see. Driven through town, heads turning, necks snapping, to see who, in this tiny town of 19,000 was riding in a limo. It seemed utterly mortifying! I wanted a side of dignity and a heaping helping of privacy when I brought my new hooters home.
 
There would be no implants for me, but things have a way of working themselves out. With time, age and pregnancies, my cups runneth over.
 
• Has a limo altered your path?
• Did you grow up in a small town?
• Has a doctor ever said/done anything that made you rethink surgery?

56 Comments

Filed under Humor, IMO

Boobs & Bones ~ Mandalay Bay, Vegas

I scooted into Vegas yesterday for hair and lunch. On the way from the salon to the restaurant inside of the Mandalay Bay Hotel, I noticed their new wall of body parts.

Some interesting pictures get taken here.

Anyone want to help me molest the wall?

Too Hot Tamales, Mary Sue Millikan and Susan Feniger, of Food Network fame, opened a Border Grill in the Mandalay Bay. I have not seen their show, but I was craving Mexican food. The special of the day was duck tacos with mango salsa.

The blend of smoky duck with the sweetness of the salsa was a taste-bud explosion! I was savoring every bite, and washing it down with pomegranate lemonade. Polishing off 2 tacos, I asked for a box for the remaining one.

This morning, I offered said taco to Tom for breakfast. He took a big bite, and promptly pulled 2 duck rib bones out of his mouth! I couldn’t believe my eyes. I quickly completed the restaurant questionnaire, taped the bones inside, included a copy of my receipt, and will mail it on Monday. We’ll see what comes of it.

Thanks for reading!

Update: I received a coupon for free dessert, and I did molest the wall.

2 Comments

Filed under Las Vegas